Being a winning player isn’t about being fearless. It’s about being vulnerable enough to have the bravery to play, while feeling the fear of your risk of ruin. Ignorance and arrogance are your enemy in life and at the table.
The divisiveness in the country regarding race and views is getting to a point of no return. The biggest problem we are facing is a lack of unification through the idea of our country being a beacon of free thought/speech and entrepreneurship. People are jaded, faded and violent. Instead of being inspired and challenged by thought, knowing we are all striving for our idea of the greater good connected as common citizens, we are threatened and rage-full individuals fighting for our place on a stage that’s already full of extras willing to do anything to get the lead role.
Here’s a little song that I wrote for all the overzealous security guards, douche bag Casino Managers and pit bosses that backed me off throughout the years. Hope you enjoy! suno.com/s/jsms82fB9dFuS6SH
Last trip was a losing trip. But I’ve gained humility and the gratitude to return to a house of love and the ability to be open to receive it. Blessings.
If you want to see how much of this platform is bots and bullshit, just make your profile private. Being able to vet every request coming in, I’m noticing how many accounts were created within the last two months following 500+ with 0 followers. Social media is an epidemic of narcissism which is only going to be intensified with AI. Individuality will be lost in the noise and the noise curated and catered for each individual will be all that individual hears.
Another casino was unsuccessful at refusing to cash me out. Happy to report I’ll be leaving with all the cash for these chips and will be taking none of their worthless plastic home with me.
Playing blackjack for a living, you’ll lose in the worst ways constantly. Then you’ll win unbelievably. Then it repeats. Kind of like a reincarnation, repeating the karmic cycle till you release attachment to emotion. Then win/lose are not up or down, good or bad, just a steady stream of positive EV. I’ve been shallowly working on this my entire career, but missing the deeper opportunity of this grind the entire time.
Growing up I would often go spearing fishing. Sometimes I would get distracted by anxiety evoking imaginations. Sometimes imagining a Bull Shark approaching, fading into view from the surrounding vast abyss. Sometimes it would take over to where I wasn’t even focused on what I was there to do. I was there to shoot a fish! To help not worry about the currently nonexistent threats, I developed a saying to help pull me back to the moment and get the job done, “focus on the fish”.
This has been an especially tough year, full of nonstop negative variance. I started letting everything build up into one big anxiety triggering, inner Molotov-cocktail. Once I dissected everything, I realized there were so many concerns and worries that had nothing to do with generating positive EV. More now than ever it is time to take that deep dive and FOCUS ON THE FISH.
“If you’re not big enough to lose, you’re not big enough to play.” -Victor Wooten
This man inspires me with his words as much as he does with his bass playing. 🙏
I only have $10k left on this trip, after losing $50k. If I lose the $10k, this will be the 3rd trip I’ve gone bust on out of 6 trips this year. What a year. Starting a session after eating a meal and I fully expect to go bust. Sucks to have no hope, but sometimes it helps. 🫥






