The Bipolar Hot Mess

😂 Oh, good heavens. We've got lime green, hot pink, sunshine yellow, and orange shoes. All on one person. This isn't an outfit. It's an entire packet of fluorescent highlighters. MM dresses like an Easter-egg in November. For autumn, it's an extraordinarily aggressive palette. But here's what makes this interesting from a fashion perspective: the individual pieces aren't necessarily bad. It's the combination that's overwhelming. The coat has a rather attractive shape, and the fuchsia dress could work beautifully with more restrained accessories. Even the yellow tote might be interesting with a navy or ivory ensemble. The problem is that nothing is allowed to be the star. The coat screams, the dress screams, the handbag screams, and then the orange shoes join the chorus. And those enormous black sunglasses add yet another strong visual element. I can already see the makeover possibilities. I'd keep the silhouette but give her a sophisticated autumn palette—perhaps a deep forest-green coat, an ivory or burgundy dress, and beautiful cognac accessories. Although I have to admit, the orange shoes with the yellow handbag are what really sent me over the edge. 😳

He fetched the Sultan himself this morning. She curtsied in the rain with his mother's feathers on her coat. Tonight, Windsor uniform and the Garter for him, yellow and the Lover's Knot for her, into St George's Hall together. No interviews, no book, no source. Just the next King and Queen, doing the job. Wow.

$148 for 24 pieces of fucking chocolate with illegible chicken scratch on the wrapper. That’s over $6 for ONE piece of chocolate. #MeghanMarkle is deluded, audacious, and gross. #asever #MeghanIsTheProblem #HarryandMeghan

So let me get this straight. Harry and Meghan are already calling this an “extraordinarily reckless” intrusion when the police haven’t even finished investigating what actually happened. But Harry can turn up at another school with cameras all over the place, one student complaining about “six cameras in my face” and another telling him to “fuck off.” Apparently cameras around their own children are an unacceptable intrusion, but cameras around everyone else’s children are just fine? And now this whole thing is being pushed through the media at exactly the same time RAVEC is reviewing their publicly funded security. I’m sorry, but can we at least wait for the police to establish what actually happened before turning this into another security campaign? Because right now it looks like they’re milking an incident that hasn’t even been fully investigated yet to make the case for taxpayer-funded protection. How dumb do they think people are? bbc.com/news/articles/cw0kl6…

Princess Catherine really did kill Meghan Markle with kindness and silence. Think about the worst things Harry and Meghan have tried to give us about Catherine. She supposedly made Meghan uncomfortable over a tube of lip gloss. Meghan told us how her own habit of hugging people was supposedly “jarring” for a lot of Brits when she first met William and Catherine. Then there was the bridesmaid dress story, where Meghan said Catherine made her cry. And yet, by Meghan’s own account, Catherine later wrote her a note, sent flowers and apologised. IMO, Catherine was trying to appease a bridezilla. Then Meghan had to bring up “Waity Katie” too. If these are the worst things you can come up with after years of trying to make Catherine the villain, then perhaps the problem was never Catherine. This is the woman they wanted people to see as cold, jealous and cruel. The woman they’ve spent years trying to cast as the villain. Meghan even called Catherine “baby brain” shortly after Catherine had given birth to Louis, and then the racism narrative was pushed through Omid Scobie. And after all of that, the great catalogue of Catherine’s alleged awfulness amounts to lip gloss, a bridesmaid disagreement, a nickname used by the press and Meghan’s own account of being a hugger in a family she found more formal than she expected. Catherine gave Meghan an extraordinary amount of grace. I honestly don’t think I could have restrained myself that much. But Catherine is class. She knows her value. She didn’t need to scream, expose or humiliate anyone to prove who she was. And perhaps that is exactly what Meghan Markle cannot stand about the Princess of Wales: she knows she can never measure up to her. What a woman Catherine, Princess of Wales, is.

Princess Catherine really did kill Meghan Markle with kindness and silence. Think about the worst things Harry and Meghan have tried to give us about Catherine. She supposedly made Meghan uncomfortable over a tube of lip gloss. Meghan told us how her own habit of hugging people was supposedly “jarring” for a lot of Brits when she first met William and Catherine. Then there was the bridesmaid dress story, where Meghan said Catherine made her cry. And yet, by Meghan’s own account, Catherine later wrote her a note, sent flowers and apologised. IMO, Catherine was trying to appease a bridezilla. Then Meghan had to bring up “Waity Katie” too. If these are the worst things you can come up with after years of trying to make Catherine the villain, then perhaps the problem was never Catherine. This is the woman they wanted people to see as cold, jealous and cruel. The woman they’ve spent years trying to cast as the villain. Meghan even called Catherine “baby brain” shortly after Catherine had given birth to Louis, and then the racism narrative was pushed through Omid Scobie. And after all of that, the great catalogue of Catherine’s alleged awfulness amounts to lip gloss, a bridesmaid disagreement, a nickname used by the press and Meghan’s own account of being a hugger in a family she found more formal than she expected. Catherine gave Meghan an extraordinary amount of grace. I honestly don’t think I could have restrained myself that much. But Catherine is class. She knows her value. She didn’t need to scream, expose or humiliate anyone to prove who she was. And perhaps that is exactly what Meghan Markle cannot stand about the Princess of Wales: she knows she can never measure up to her. What a woman Catherine, Princess of Wales, is.

It’s funny how the #PrincessofWales can do school drop offs and pickups herself without a convoy and NO PRESS, being the future Queen and all, yet #HarryandMeghan sit home and send bodyguards to drop off their kids who are never going to be constitutionally relevant. They “need” a whole convoy which is probably one of the most attention seeking and “look at me” things they can do. A convoy of blacked out SUVs in the Cotswolds? That’s not obvious. If they had the nanny drop them off in a plain old BMW not one person would bat an eye. But nooooo the Private Citizens are WAY too iMpoRtANt. #MeghanMarkle