I’ve only gone and done it.

Not on here much anymore, but just popped in to say cheers to @Nicholastwatson who is entirely to blame for me turning to the Madeira this afternoon. Cheers all, have a grand weekend x

Cheers all, best Friday wishes from the servant’s quarters.

Quick question. Is it okay to take a mug of tea into the toilet with you? *Asking for a friend, and his appalled wife.

👀

Eleven years ago I was in Kuala Lumpur thinking about buying garlic shampoo.

Could someone tell the commentary team in the Scotland v SA match to just shut the fuck up for second. It’s a wall of inane noise at the mo.

Anyone else embarrassed by this in a ‘wealthy’ nation?

‘It’s a...nice day for a...light sweater, it’s a...nice day for a...CARDIGAAAAN!’

My Mac: *autosaves file* Me: Thanks for that, where is it? My Mac:...

Well, that’s Crimbo sorted.

Things that may kill me prematurely: Car accident: 0.08% Murder: 0.02% Drowning: 0.09% Tripped by a dog whilst carrying laundry downstairs: 98%

Dinner time.

Scottish morning after pill.

How I imagine I’ll look after four days off the booze.

Fascinating the way everyone is ignoring the fact Trump garnered less votes than last time out. The nominal left needs to actually be left and redistribute wealth, and they must do it fast otherwise people will see no point in voting for them. Yes Labour, I am looking at you.

He was right. Sometimes that flight is breathtakingly beautiful.

Read it and weep, commoners.