@CptTittyMeat

STAY AWAY FROM ME! GET A JOB! The Bay Area made me. Mr. Rogers & Lil' Kim raised me. I'm just a figment of yo imagination. Pay me or pay me no nevermind πŸ€·πŸ½β€β™€οΈ

 asscrack of cali
Joined August 2009
  • Tweets206K
  • Following468
  • Followers4.7K
13.4KMedia
Like Pinky lil sister🌚
Em just vibing@D_incredibleAJ8 Oct 2023
How y’all look with pink hairβ‰οΈπŸ‘€
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Wait a damn MINUTE. The Wonder Years got canceled cause Fred Savage was born a pig?????
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Inconvenience????????
ABC30 Fresno@ABC305h
Fresno Police Chief Mindy Casto is addressing the recent arrest of Fresno City Council District 1 candidate Naindeep Singh. abc30.com/post/fresno-police…
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I told you i came here with my DICK IN MY HAND not the blickkkk
LuLu πŸ‹
@_lupee_loo9h
You got a gun up in yo waist? Please don’t shoot up the place!
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Bitch my heart hurt so bad rn πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’” AUTUMN WILL NEVER FORGET WHAT YOU DID FOR HER
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That booboo ass Esquire movie
IG: Lotsofdinero
@LotsofDineroOct 26
What the worst Denzel Washington movie to y’all ?? We having a debate at work lol..
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Do any of my Bay Area moots remember G5 the Jett? What happened to that man 🀣🀣🀣
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I CAN'T HAVE A PORK SNACK NOW????
Grandma Good Pussy aka Butt Floss Bikini Lady@CptTittyMeat19 Mar 2024
Late night bacon snack
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Lil snacky snack, DON'T TRIM MY FAT
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Why did my ass think they meant the Bay Area's Kensington until they showed the drugsπŸ’€
π‘΄π’Šπ’…π’π’Šπ’ˆπ’‰π’• π‘΄π’π’π’‚π’šπ’†
@MidnightMonayeOct 26
THIS is who Keshia Cole is dating…… somebody go get her please
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Ok so BOOM. Imagine your 46yo son lives with you. And he has a son from 1 bm and 2 daughters with another woman. And that other woman ends up MARRYING the stepson. Then chops his head off in bed and covers him up w/ a blanket for you to find
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It's almost lunch time and my phone is on 90% still. They are working me to the BONE omg 😭
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Ok so stupid question time. You gotta wear at least a pair a day. Are you washing 1 outfit a day? Are we letting them dry first and tossing in the hamper bc I thought dry blood was bad. If you stick em in a bag won't they mildew? I have questions!
♑⃝
@wine_x13Oct 25
Ladies who use period panties…come out and tell me how the hell? Lol. So…I bought a pair last night to "try". I’ve been resistant to the idea for like a year. But decided to try it. WHAT DO YALL DO AFTER THE PANTIES ARE USED? We’re just…..throwing them away!!!!!
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"Mabel, Mabel if you're able, save your horseplay for the stable!" I'm watching As Told By Ginger and Macie got me WEAK 🀣🀣🀣🀣
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About to take a eucalyptus and jasmine sea salt bubble bath bc I am an old hoe and my body hurts
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No I'm still trying to figure out how i pulled a muscle in my neck so bad i ended up at urgent care. All bc i had a coughing fit in my sleep
Pattagold 🐱✨@everytimeigooutOct 25
I made a normal ass, not even fast, motion to reach for my robe at the foot of my bed and my shoulder immediately got all stiff and weird and started hurting then the pain just traveled down my entire right side now I'm in bed with an icy hot patch 🫩
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FUCK
es@078615sOct 23
that random period in life where u rediscover butter on bread
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Grandma Good Pussy aka Butt Floss Bikini Lady retweeted
Esluva πŸŽ€
@Vesper_2005Oct 24
When somebody vacuuming and they bouta do in front of the couch πŸ˜­πŸ˜‚
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PROGRESS BITCH
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Yeah i wouldn't have liked my fridge in this but the closet fuck yeah bitch hoe
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They're calling you a poopy cow beloved
bel 击 is under arrest!@ieronotcuteOct 23
wdym flowers bloom where you walk is an insult :((( it's such a pretty phrase
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