Grand Poo-Bah of Roy's Test Kitchen. https://xitter.cf/t.co/FGZBIvhHWG
Katy, Texas
Joined April 2015
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Me reading this and thinking about how many can openers I've had to replace over the past few years:
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Roy Bright retweeted
“I tell ya, life isn’t easy. Today’s been a terrible day. I got up this morning, picked up my shirt, a button fell off. Picked up my briefcase, the handle fell off. I’m afraid to go to the bathroom.”
Texans when the temperature outside is under 75 degrees: Oh my God, this weather is perfect!
Texans when the restaurant they're in is under 78 degrees:
Dearest Marie,
As the harshness of winter hangs in the air, I pray I finish this text before the frostbite claims my fingers...
Roy Bright retweeted
📺On November 13, 1987, Sonny and Cher reunited and performed ‘I Got You Babe’ on ‘Late Night with David Letterman’
This was me yelling at the TV at the end of the #ThePenguin finale:
Characters on the Magic Spoon boxes look like a mad scientist's first horrific failed attempts to create Mr. Sparkle.
"Morning, Bill! What are you up to today?"
"Oh, not much. Just taking these boat securing devices down to the pawn shop."
Roy Bright retweeted
Been through all kinda times, dark as shit, happy has hell, and all the in-betweens. Look for light. Be easy on yourself. Reach out to folks who get it. Eat food you love. Drink water. You are stronger than you know.
13 Monkeys - 39 Monkeys must have all gone straight to video. Are they on Tubi?
Police warn South Carolina residents to secure doors and windows after 40 monkeys escaped a research facility. cbsn.ws/4eq2D7s
How many McDonald's gift certificates do you think he's received as birthday gifts over the years? 🍔🪨🪟
#wrestling #WWE #AEW
Roy Bright retweeted
I got so confused by all the yard signs, I think I may have voted for a realtor.
Just some random, modern-day paladin out there reminding us that we didn't appreciate Johnny Bravo enough.
Your yearly #Halloween reminder that Leslie Jordan was in "Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday."
