Your orange emperor has no clothes!

Holy shit @Tubi Your writers are genius!!!! I’m dying!

That @Tubi commercial is f&$$(ing HILARIOUS! #comedy #commercial #tubi

If everyone who’s ever worked for you says you’re a crazy piece of shit…you’re a crazy piece of shit!

If you’re trying to quit #smoking, maybe wait a while to see @jokermovie

Loved @jokermovie but I smell like a pack of Marlboros afterwards! #smoking #movies @ladygaga

Thanks for the TWELVE hours I got to spend waiting on my flight because of your incompetence @united #vegas

Buying Furniture: I used to say things like "the kids will hurt themselves on it." Now I say things like, "The Roomba will get caught on that." #parenting

#Raygunn is breakdancing’s #racheldolezal

Fun Fact: The US Army sends Soldiers to both the Olympics AND Paralympics. Funner Fact: If you don't already qualify for the second one, they have programs to help you meet the requirements.

These #olympics brought to you by @SnoopDogg

Mother’s Day is that one day a year when you try find a restaurant that’s nice enough for mom, but sh**ty enough to not have a long wait. #mothersday

My take on @dunemovie pt 2: We’ve come a long way when the black girl has to explain to the white dude how to keep OFF rhythm.

I got today’s @wordle_eth in one but I spelled it Lizzo, so it didn’t count.

Check out Dewayne White, Comedian. Best of Prince William 2024 va.secondstreetapp.com/og/5e…

Here’s a new one: my @Uber driver just asked if ‘I minded’ if he stopped for gas! Why not? Any other errands you wanna run? Maybe don’t take the fare if you don’t have gas in the car to make the trip!

Thanks @united for texting me that the #flight I’m on has landed. I had no idea! Lol

Maybe if @usaa didn’t have to pay @gronk they could lower their rates and we’d all come back!

Let the hate come! @taylorswift13 is better than @Beyonce #UnpopularOpinion @peteybergen told me to say this!!

Check out this article in @AARP with @BobbyHenline Demi Chang, and ME!!! aarp.org/home-family/voices/…