Captain Davebeard 🏴‍☠️

Thought provoking.

Just saw a homeless guy I know, not a bad guy. He lost his daughter in a car accident his wife divorced him and he went insane. But he was speeding by on a bike on his phone as if he had somewhere to be and my first thought was, why? He has nowhere to be. He never will. He's got nothing. He'll never have anything. But he's out there speeding along anyway and on my way to my mediocre job I realized we have a lot in common.

Me when I have got called in to work every day this week (true story)

It's finally trenchcoat season gamers. You need to be emo-maxxing. Ironically pretending to be an emo is one of the only things that brings me joy.

I want to troll women. I want to invite women to my house to Netflix and chill and then not have sex with them.

What is it with autists not wanting to be men?

If you ever had a mean, angry stepdad, I promise you I look just like him. I might be your stepdad.

honestly any woman who can't pull a musket from her cleavage isn't even on my radar right now

Will I get my @madoka_exedraEN account back?

My caffeine addiction could not possibly get any worse. I'm going to start snorting coffee grounds.

America needs a little living space.

Afraid to enlist in the war to invade Canada. On the one hand I fully support the conflict but on the other if I died to a Canadian I would be branded an eternal homosexual.

Random hot take; Smiling Friends wasn't good. Its laughs per minute plummeted hard after the first season which was good because it was unique at the time. By its third season its humor had gone completely stale.

I am experiencing the Book of Job in real time rn, I have just lost everything I held dear to me.

I might have lost my @madoka_exedraEN account and if I did I think I'm going to die.

Look what we have done to the Japanese.