Extermi-Knight Podcast

I'm not saying you should drive down the highway at night, whilst saying "bloody Mary" three times in the side mirror, just to watch her trip her ghost ass over chasing you. I'm just saying to cover the other mirrors. #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

Friendly Reminder: With the start of Spring, it is Nambian Flying Snake migration season. These air noodles are mostly harmless, and mostly land when needing a rest or a drink. Keep a good distance, but feel free to witness the majesty of it. #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

If your friend is a Lycanthrope, and you purposefully trick them into eating chocolate, you are a massive dick and deserve the asskicking you receive. Or even the passing of the curse. #ExtermiKnightExoticExteminators

Breaking News: You know that Mind Flayer?

BREAKING NEWS: There is a Mindflayer in the downtown area, sucking on... people's brains and eating their memories? OH THAT IS IT! SQUARE UP YOU CTHULHU RIP OFF! #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

BREAKING NEWS: There is a Mindflayer in the downtown area, sucking on people's brains and eating their memories. Whilst I am currently here, please be careful as these... I swear I've sent this tweet already... #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

BREAKING NEWS: There is a Mindflayer in the downtown area, sucking on people's brains and eating their memories. Whilst I am currently here, please be careful as these things can be dan...gerous... Anyone else feeling Deja Vu? #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

BREAKING NEWS: There is a Mindflayer in the downtown area, sucking on people's brains and eating their memories. Whilst I am currently here, please be careful as these things can be... can be dangerous. #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

BREAKING NEWS: There is a Mindflayer in the downtown area, sucking on people's brains and eating their memories. Whilst I am currently here, please be careful as these things can be dangerous...? #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

BREAKING NEWS: There is a Mindflayer in the downtown area, sucking on people's brains and eating their memories. Whilst I am currently here, please be careful as these things can be dangerous #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

BREAKING NEWS: There is a Mindflayer in the downtown area, sucking on people's brains and eating their memories. Whilst I am currently here, please be careful as these things can be dangerous. #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

Why are so many people afraid of Black Hounds? Is it cos they turn up when people are close to death? If I had to choose between a clackity skeleton in a cloak or the goodest boi Moddey Dhoo to walk me to the other side, I know who I'd choose! #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

You wanna know what really angers me?! Little girls that want unicorns! Do you know how many unicorns have their god damn hearts broken because they are "Too hard to raise"?!?! FFS DON'T GET A UNICORN IF YOU CAN'T LOOK AFTER IT! #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

A pack of Kelpies have been sighted on the eastern shore of Lake Kilpatrick. Please keep away from any horses you see standing near or in the water. Especially if the horse is half fish. Or tries to talk you into coming into the water with them. #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

If a tiny irish man offers you a pot of gold in return for a favour, beware; you may be dealing with a Leprechaun, who are notorious tricksters, and will lie to get what they want. Or worse, it could be a short Irish man who is still on the piss. #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

Dragon Turtles are not "sometimes pets". These creatures will live through generations of your family, growing fairly huge, but offer good luck to your family in return. Also, every girl wants the person riding on the back of a Dragon Turtle. #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

I can tell the difference between a Yeti, a Sasquatch, a Big Foot, a Skunk Bear, and a Yowie. This is the reason why I charge the money I do. Because if you don't pay me what we agreed on, I'll send one of them to your home. #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

You know what's worse than how fast rabbits breed? How fast Jackalopes breed. Those assholes can fill a room in weeks. Why the hell is a horned rabbit getting more than me?! #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

So apparently I can exorcise ghosts and demons via Zoom calls. This helps with Social Distancing and all. Offering $50 off all Zoom-orcising calls. #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators

PLEASE DON'T SLEEP WITH THE LEANAN SIDHE! Looking at you @LaughablyE @TftWn @chainofbeing @ParacelsusPod! Swear to god don't make me come down there! #ExtermiKnightExoticExterminators