Toad

Yes! I went in to have my son "Are you here with an appointment with L&D" "No" "Ok, what brings you in today" "I'm here to have a baby" **Visibly confused** "you what?" **Visibly pregnant** "Im having a baby...?"

Should I take it personally that a porch pirate opened my package, decided they didnt want it, and brought it back?

Had a dream I wrote the wrong name for the birth certificate paperwork and now Im worried that I at least spelled little boys name wrong

My deck becomes the "big fridge" for parties and drinks and I love it

Putting toddler to bed "Mom, I want to read Jesus (the Bible) but I'm crabby" "Ok... do you want to pray about it?" "Yeah..." Proceeded to make me restart prayers about 4 times but she insists she is less crabby now.

I keep forgetting that boys will just spontaneously pee in the middle of a diaper change.

One of my favorite people is an old coworker of mine. My toddler handed her a dead cicada and without batting an eye, she showed her all the anatomy and wore it on her shirt like a pin.

Im in one room feeding baby boy, husband and toddler are in another reading books to eachother. My heart is so full.

Worst part about being home from the hospital is that nobody is excited for me when I go to the bathroom anymore #postpartumthings

I know I need to sleep when he sleeps, but I just cant put this little boy down.

Guess what I forgot to order and only realized once my epidural kicked in 🤦‍♀️

Ok everyone, what do we think baby is going to be?

Ok prayers please. Apparently I am not peeing myself like I thought. Its baby day.

Good news: found out why we have so many fruit flies. Bad news: it involved maggots and a single potato

Washer broke and the maintenance guy called to schedule a date to swap it out. Me "yeah that works. But can you call before you are on your way? Im just exceptionally pregnant and want to make sure Im home and not having a baby when you come" 😅

Doing garage sales today and witnessed an old man find items to purchase, walk to the trunk of his car, pull out a JUG OF PENNIES, and proceed to pay for his items strictly with pennies...I know we have been complaining about boomer parents but this has got to be worse right?

Ah yes, waking up sick at 38 weeks pregnant. Last minute antibodies before I sneeze this baby out...

My almost 3 year old picking out a book to read: mom, what this about? Me: ancient Egypt and mummies Her: mummies? And babies too? Oh how I love her.