Jerry Seinfeld claims nobody actually cares how you are doing and admits he would never socialize if he wasn't married
"If I had not gotten married, I never would have gone anywhere with anyone"
"my wife has people over every night. I'm there. I dress nice... the second they walk in, give me a glass of white wine, and then I'm okay"
"a comedian is a host in a way. You're hosting that night for those people, and everything that happens in that room is to your design"
"I can't take the bullshit conversation. Let's talk about something. Let's get into something. 'How are you, how are you?' Who cares how anybody is?"
"What about couples dinners? To me, the couples dinner is arranged when one of you relates to one half of the other couple, and everybody else just hangs on to the side of the lifeboat"
Mike Irvin retweeted
33 years ago this weekend, two Delta Force snipers made a choice almost nobody would make.
Master Sergeant Gary Gordon was 33, from Lincoln, Maine, with a wife and two young kids at home. Sergeant First Class Randy Shughart was 35, a farm kid from Newville, Pennsylvania.
On October 3, 1993, they were in a Black Hawk circling over Mogadishu when another Black Hawk, Super 64, was shot down. Pilot Mike Durant was alive in the wreckage with a broken back and a crushed leg. His crew was hurt. There were no friendly ground forces anywhere near them, and hundreds of armed militia and locals were already converging on the crash site.
From the air, Gordon and Shughart could see exactly what was coming.
They asked to be dropped in. Command said no.
They asked again. No again.
They asked a third time and finally got the green light.
Their helicopter set them down nearby and they fought their way to the wreck on foot. Two men, carrying only what they had on them. They pulled Durant out of the cockpit, set him up in a safer position, and started holding off the crowd.
For a while, it worked. They kept the mob back with precise, steady fire while the numbers against them kept growing.
Shughart was killed first.
Gordon kept fighting alone. When he was nearly out of ammunition, he went back to Durant, handed him a rifle, and told him good luck. Then he went back out. He was killed minutes later.
Durant was captured, beaten, and held for 11 days. He came home alive. He has said for decades that he's only here because of those two men.
In 1994 Gordon and Shughart were posthumously awarded the Medal of Honor, the first since Vietnam. The Navy later named two ships after them, the USNS Gordon and the USNS Shughart.
They didn't stumble into that fight. They watched it from above, understood the odds, and asked three times to go anyway.
Gary Gordon and Randy Shughart. Remember their names.
Mike Irvin retweeted
Social media didn’t make people empathetic, it made them AUDIENCE. They don’t want you healed, they want the next scene of your breakdown so they can type “stay strong” and keep eating.
Mike Irvin retweeted
Displaying anger and emotion are signs of weakness; you cannot control yourself, so how can you control anything?
Mike Irvin retweeted
The real danger is not that computers will begin to think like men, but that men will begin to think like computers.
— Sydney J. Harris
Mike Irvin retweeted
He had never drawn a paycheck as a professional firefighter. On the morning of 11 September 2001 he became the man in the red bandana.
Welles Crowther was twenty-four and at his desk as a stock trader on the 104th floor of the South Tower when the attacks began. He did not leave the building and stay out. He tied the red bandana he always carried over his face and went back into the smoke three times.
People who lived that morning remembered a steady voice. He carried one injured woman on his back. He led groups down seventeen floors toward air they could breathe. He had trained as a volunteer with the fire company in Nyack, New York. He had never held a professional post.
Those who made it out later said he had helped as many as eighteen people reach safety. He was last seen going back up the stairs with firefighters. The South Tower fell at 9:59 a.m. Months afterward, survivors put a name to the stranger in the bandana.
Boston College keeps the story in its Red Bandana Game. In May 2026 he received the Presidential Medal of Freedom after his death. Twenty-four years old. Three returns into the fire. As many as eighteen lives. A piece of cloth that still means the choice to go back.
Mike Irvin retweeted
This entire story is Trump's presidency in a nutshell: the DOJ brings totally baseless charges against an ordinary citizen in order to satisfy Trump's narcissistic delusions, and then, after having wreaked havoc on the guy's life, says "Never mind." Utterly pathetic.
BREAKING: The Justice Department moved to dismiss the Reflecting Pool vandalism charge against Olympian David Hearn, citing "flawed installation" work by a contractor. abcnews.link/5lV8ZBc
Mike Irvin retweeted
I grew up in Pat Summerall’s NFL.
CBS Sports announced that lead NFL color commentator Tony Romo has been placed on indefinite leave.
J.J. Watt will be Romo's replacement, @AdamSchefter
Mike Irvin retweeted
Nothing better captures how clownish our politics have become than the fact that two of the easiest questions imaginable—"Did Biden win in 2020?" and "Can men get pregnant?"—keep tripping up powerful people as if they're being asked to solve quantum physics. It's perfect.
Mike Irvin retweeted
THE AGENCY is such a terrific show, and it’s strange to me that it gets so little attention from critics (let alone promotion from its streaming network). Strong recommend.
Mike Irvin retweeted
Currently one of the best TV shows I’ve ever seen is invisible on Paramount due to zero marketing. The Agency on Paramount just released season two. The cast with Michael Fassbender, Richard Gere and Jeffrey Wright is some of the best acting and writing since MadMen / The Wire
Mike Irvin retweeted
Terrible old ideas that have been forgotten, or were never known, for a generation and seen as new and exciting by young, often affluent activists. Meanwhile, the one group you can be certain despises socialism is made up of everyone who has ever lived under it.
Love or hate the DSA agenda, the one thing you can't say about is they're bringing "new ideas" to the conversation. thedispatch.com/article/mamd…
Mike Irvin retweeted
“The most important single central fact about a free market is that no exchange takes place unless both parties benefit.”
— Milton Friedman
Mike Irvin retweeted
A mentor told me this: Learn the difference between peace and avoidance. Peace is choosing not to fight battles that don’t matter. Avoidance is refusing to face the battles that do. Real wisdom is having awareness of which one you’re doing in the moment. I’ll never forget that.
Mike Irvin retweeted
i get really really fucking tired of this discussion every time it crosses my screen. i need you to adjust all of your plans by 20 minutes so that you trick yourself into being on time. figure out coping mechanisms for your short fallings for the love of god.





























