PHILIPPINE 9-DASH LINE COVERS CHINA! In a groundbreaking discovery from the archives of DAILY TRIBUNE's brilliant graphic artists, a newly unearthed map appears to show that the Philippines' nine-dash line covers China. After an extensive study involving a computer, a mouse and a very talented graphic artist, we have concluded that the Philippines now has sovereign rights over China. And since drawing lines on a map makes territorial claims legitimate, we see absolutely no reason why ours should be treated any differently. We therefore respectfully ask Beijing to recognize our historical rights, refrain from entering our waters and settle all disputes through peaceful dialogue. After all, we love peace. #dailytribune #satire #China