Asfand Qazi

Big up the @CostaCoffee. Whenever I have problems collecting points on the app, they always help me out.

Woman Paralyzed After Chiropractor Visit: youtu.be/k7rB25rWwX0 This is what the pseudoscience of chiropracty can do to you... Keep away!

English... Why you so weird? Floating your boat and getting your goat are valid expressions with opposite meanings. WHY?!!

Why do I keep humming the old Crystal Maze theme to myself?

Every offshoring failure is due to treating offshore staff as resources and thus trying to cut costs by hiring the cheapest. The best reason to hire offshore is to search for the best talent globally.

My little girl just told me she'd like to go to America so she can see the big green lady with the ice cream

It just hit me... I think the concept of duck typing was inspired by the witch trial scene in "Monty Python and the Holy Grail"... youtu.be/_rMsgmaBV8g

How can we expect our engineers to deliver results is we haven't properly defined them first?

If you're following the 12 factor methodology (which you usually should be) and configuring your app with environment variables, validate them at application start. It sucks to find out an environment variable is wrongly formatted when someone tries to use your service.

Chancellor be like: "We need to rescue the economy and help regular people out. Let's let bankers make more money."

"DevOps was administrators refusing their primary purpose." - some dude on LinkedIn

People who think you should have to multitask in the workplace need to try riding a bike while doing a crossword and then doing them both separately. What gets you further with less danger?

Accurate

Do you know why the tortoise beat the hare in the race? The tortoise didn't have parallel workstreams. It had one focused task to work on whereas context switching overhead killed the hare's productivity. #Productivity #Leadership

I have a love/hate relationship with tests. When they're there, I hate maintaining them. When they're not there, I miss them. I think I'm in a toxic relationship with testing. #SoftwareEngineering #TDD #TestDrivenDevelopment

"We need people who can multitask", the interviewer said. "Good luck finding them," I said as got up, put on my shades, and left the room. OK, that never really happened. The point, though, is that multitasking kills productivity and workers shouldn't have to deal with it.

Careful planning almost always results in less code being written. In other words, you have to slow down to speed up.

Working on a software project with a great development and deployment process, with fast and safe #ContinuousDelivery is like living in a highly developed country. It's really easy and fun to be there but it's really hard to build. #SoftwareEngineering

Apparently I'm confusing my 7 year old daughter by telling her that Her Majesty's coffin had the royal sceptre, crown, and holy hand grenade of Antioch placed on it #QueenElizabethII #queensfuneral