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Morton

Joined June 2019
Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)Photo by Ryan Shap (@RyanShap)
That feeling when you blow your N64 cartridge and it works🙏🏼
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Apple Watch RRP $1200.00 Blue thing under a Diet Coke lid RRP $3.50. Do the math. #diybling
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Free parenting advice: to avoid your child from developing a fear of monsters under the bed, simply remove the bed frame and allow your child to sleep on the mattress directly on the floor. Warning: child may develop into a minimalist hipster as a result
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Why use tinder when you can just download the Hungry Jacks Shake & Win app...Equally as exciting and addictive! #2for1rodeo
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What’s the more appropriate way to walk around the house after a shower whilst guests are around.
50%Towel around your waist
50%Towel over your shoulders
8 votes • Final results
It annoys me when movie posters have the actors undenearth each other’s names. Surely you can just put the name on top of their photo? Can’t be that hard
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Ryan Shap retweeted
No one enjoys the month of January more than @JeddZetzer. #straightupfacts #tennistalks
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Read something about smoking weed being bad for your lungs, so I think I’m gonna quit reading.
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Gonna surprise Santa this year with some weed cookies. If my man’s gonna be flying around the world all night, he should at least be vibin
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Working in retail: Colleague approaches... (don’t say it, don’t say it) “What time are ya working till?”
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What’s with all these new Snoop Dog advertisements I’m seeing? Weed prices in the States must be getting pricey. #diversifyyourincome
Just copped some new Clarke’s. Small sizes, and all shoes seem to be black, but the lady told me they make me look taller. #backtoscool
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I was today years old when I discovered the ‘W’ in Big W stands for Woolworths. Big W= Big Woolworths
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Now that I think of it, “no swimming in the pool until 30 minutes of eating a meal” was useless advice! I was doing cannonballs and playing Marco Polo for godsake! Not competing for a gold medal. Not on Mum, not on.
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For a Victorian, there has never been and never will be a better to time to run through the streets naked without seeing anyone you know than tonight at 7:30-10:30pm. #streaker
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