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Proudly representing Ambridge & Borcestshire East. Life peer in the House of Sausages. Collector of rare chutneys. Former Love Island contestant (briefly)

Ambridge
Joined March 2015
Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)Photo by Ash (@Safetyconundrum)
The Labour Bloodbath Begins. JonathanPie.com
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Controversial I know, but I used to love school dinners
A British school dinner in 1975 was cooked on-site, from whole ingredients, by a dinner lady who knew, without consulting a nutritional database, what a growing child needed to eat. The dinner was: roast beef, gravy from the drippings, boiled potatoes, cabbage, and sponge pudding with custard made from eggs and milk. Or shepherd's pie from real mince. Or liver and onions. Or fish on Friday, battered and fried in beef dripping. In a single sitting: haem iron from the meat, calcium from the custard, B12 from the liver, vitamin A from the gravy fat, vitamin D from the eggs, zinc from the beef, omega-3 from the fish, collagen from the gravy, complete protein from every component, and roughly 800 calories dense enough to carry a child through an afternoon of running around a playground in January. Then the system changed. In the 1980s and 1990s, local authority catering was outsourced. On-site kitchens closed. Dinner ladies were made redundant. Central production kitchens began manufacturing meals reheated in convection ovens. The roast beef became a turkey twizzler. The shepherd's pie became a pre-formed disc of processed potato and reconstituted meat product. The liver disappeared entirely. The fish was coated in breadcrumbs and fried in vegetable oil. The custard was made from powder, water, and yellow colouring. The sponge pudding was replaced by a yoghurt tube. Jamie Oliver's 2005 campaign filmed children who could not identify a tomato. Kitchens where the only equipment was a deep fryer and a microwave. Menus that contained less nutritional value in a full week than the 1975 dinner contained in a single sitting. The government pledged reform. But the on-site kitchen did not come back. The dinner lady did not come back. The roast beef and the liver and the custard made from eggs did not come back. The 1975 dinner lady, who had no nutritional qualification and had never heard of a DIAAS score, was producing, at approximately 30p per serving, a meal that contained more bioavailable nutrition than anything the modern system produces at three times the cost. She has been replaced by a supply chain. The supply chain is more expensive. The children are less well fed. The dinner lady knew what she was doing. Nobody asked her.
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Our founder and CEO will speaking at the @CEME_LDN "OWN YOUR FUTURE" event on Tuesday 24th March 2026. Details on the flyer shown.
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Dear @jk_rowling, Sina Ashgbousi was a true Harry Potter fan, the kind who believed in magic because the world needed it.🪄 For his birthday, they brought Sina Ashkboosi a Hogwarts letter. They took him to Café Platform in Tehran. The Sorting Hat was placed on his head. He wore Slytherin robes and a green scarf, held a wand in his hand, and blew out his birthday candles like a kid living inside his favorite story. Days later, in Tehran, he was shot by a bullet and turned into a name that must never be forgotten. In memory of Sina, forever 17 years old 🪄
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🚨 PLEASE SHARE THIS POST. UNBELIEVABLE CONSIDERING THE WIKIMEDIA FOUNDATION (AN AMERICAN COMPANY) IS DISTRIBUTING CONTENT BANNED BY THE AMERICAN OFAC ALLOWING A STATE SPONSOR OF TERRORISM TO LICENSE THEIR OWN PROPAGANDA.
This is a very important post by @npovmedia please watch. Anyone who is not aware of what is going on inside Iran and the worst extermination of human beings in contemporary modern history, be aware that the regime is dominating social media algorithms. #IranMassacre
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This is a very important post by @npovmedia please watch. Anyone who is not aware of what is going on inside Iran and the worst extermination of human beings in contemporary modern history, be aware that the regime is dominating social media algorithms. #IranMassacre
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Music makes all the difference 🙌
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🤣🤣🤣🤣👇
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Well done lads! Lest we forget.
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This budding farmer is loving the livestock mart a bit too much 😂🙌 📸 Martyn Heal
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BRAND NEW Prince Andrew album responds to allegations…Brand new ep of Spitting Image: The Rest Is Bulls*!t out at 7pm on YouTube!
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Many fishing industry workers put their lives at risk to provide our fish - as shown by these North Sea trawlermen during a storm. But, a 12-year deal by the Labour government with the EU has given fishing access to EU boats into UK waters. Shameful sell out of UK fishing.
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Shop for top quality delicious Fosse Products at our London farmers marketstalls this weekend! Who will be cooking roast chicken, sausages (have new pork ones & unsmoked gammons at Brockley butchery stall!), homemade chicken liver pâté, bone broth, ⭐️picnic pies & sausage rolls!
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Good to see the British couple released by the Taliban in Afghanistan have landed back in the U.K. They described their experience as 'harrowing,' the conditions as 'barbaric' and the facilities as 'beyond third world.' Well, that's Heathrow Airport for you.
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Big thanks to the producers for making this for the office and coming to view the first pass on the film. It’s all looking pretty amazing; easily my best film to date, it feels unique and fresh. I hope people dig it when we release. #Horror #Film #Feature
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They really shouldn’t be importing Class A drugs That’s illegal
WATCH: U.S. Coast Guard in Miami offloaded approximately 9,970 pounds of cocaine worth $73.7 million Tuesday
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How to make a totally invisible plane
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