🎵📝 Writer, composer, pet botherer, worrier woman, flâneuse. Retired Tweeter.

London, England
Joined December 2009
As the TV UK industry implodes, I consider pitching my latest pilot script as 600 consecutive tiktoks
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Honoured that my script GRIEFCASE features in this - a deeply personal comedy drama about loss, friendship... and Jeremy Paxman. Take a look if you fancy a journey into the darker corners of my mind
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I got so excited watching Top Gun: Maverick that one of my boobs fell out of my bra and I didn’t even notice til the credits
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Commissioners love to ask "Why now?" "Why do we need this script now?" Like I don't know pal, why do we need a 5th series of Mrs Browns Boys? Why is now a good time for another series following a well known comedian going on holibobs with his mum? I'm going to screeaaaammm
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It’s actually very sexycool for two adults in their 30s to take a midweek day off work and go on all the kids’ rides at Legoland
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Me putting my feet up for an evening of everyone being as obsessed with ⁦@mincemeatlive⁩ as me: #OlivierAwards
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If you know who this house belongs to, we can be friends
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@A_GarrickWright why did I just have a feeling you would get this?
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Valentine's Day after 1 year: "First Valentine's with tHiS oNe XoX" Valentine's Day after 5 years: "You're quite pretty when you don't dress like a teenage boy"
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I laughed, I cried, I’ve never come so close to a mid-act ovation as I did after @MicaParisSoul and @mayjqb’s Museum of Loss. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ @REHABTheMusical
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Mollie is the patron saint of all of us who lost our minds over fuckboys with questionable hair gel at 21, and I for one really feel for her. Can’t wait to see how her villain origin story plays out. #TheTraitorsUK thanks for getting me through January 🔥
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My train was delayed 30 mins, so I sat next to a guy in the waiting room who listened to Best Years of our Lives by Baha Men on repeat for almost that whole time. I fear not striking up conversation with him will be one of the great regrets of my life
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Katie Butler retweeted
me and the girls
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Katie Butler retweeted
You’re playing devils advocate? Cool. I’m playing with my Sylvanian families. This hedgehog owns a windmill.
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Other people: breathy covers by gen Z artists with an inexplicable aversion to capital letters Me, an intellectual:
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“I’m a people pleaser” is officially the new “I’m an empath.” The worst person you’ve ever met thinks they’re a people pleaser. Never pleased a person in their life
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May we all set our sights as high for ourselves as the trick or treater child I saw last night, who rather than collecting treats in some kind of novelty bucket, was wheeling round an actual suitcase.
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