????

might’ve been too deep in my bag there

she see you on pen gu and forget you from shiverpool #rockhopper

can’t get mad at what’s on the tv while you’re holding the remote

anyways

we as a collective have GOT to start making pumpkin pies thinner..? like wtf is going on man that little ass crust and y’all wanna give me A BRICKOF pumpkin flavoredjello bitch FUCK YOU ITS A PIE!!! MAKE THEM THINNER.. THAT LIL BABY ASS CRUST AND YOU WANNA GIVE THE PUMPKINA BBL

can i get sumn off my chest

aight grandpa i’ll let u rest

old ppl b gettin mad at ppl for standing in line while also standing in the same line

old ppl be getting mad at u for ashing ur cigarettes in an ashtray

old ppl b gettin mad at u for putting trash in a trash can

bought a tandem bicycle because i needed a lil more foot space #nothelpful

i thought wells were just dark and you weren’t supposed to see the bottom until one day i asked the well what it wished and it unlocked the rest of the well and i could see all the way down… pretty crazy stuff man, never know what’s out there until you try it!!

you lose the light in your eyes when you have to beat up your first homeless man

if u like corn nuts u should try out uncooked pasta!!

trying to explain to your homeboy that his gf is just a reply guy and not actually talking to all these men on the TL #ripleysbelieveitornot

one game before work… one game before work won game before win game before win game win game win game win game twitch.tv/yogrannyfavoritewh…

jus put the kids tuition on petr yan #lockemup

yard sale shorty kinda bad so i bought up all the panties #ethicalpervert

shower beers just aren’t cutting it anymore, where’s my dildo