Gray

It’s not my place to restrict consenting people. However, there is a difference between: - Legal Adult (18-19yrs) - Completed Brain Development (mid 20’s) - Emotional maturity / working life experience (~hopefully by your 30) - “Full Grown Man” (subjective but let’s assume 40s) The better question is: what are the risks of an almost 20yr age gap, where the younger party has yet to have a full suite of life experiences / date within their age group? The risks are outlined in the history of our alimony laws. Relationships generally (not just marriage) require sacrifice that can result in insurmountable damages and lost opportunities once the relationship ends. Pulling someone into a relationship before they’ve really finished their education, started a career, and experienced life as financially independent IS risky for both parties (but mainly for the younger party). Do we believe a 19yr old has a full grasp of that and how to protect / maintain their autonomy and personal growth in this relationship? Or would it be easier for this 38yr old to find someone in their late 20’s? I don’t think it’s helpful to be “disgusted” by this (as some comments suggest). Shame doesn’t really fix this. We need to educate younger gays on the risks and let them make an informed decision. Older men will always exist and they will (usually) have more resources and wisdom than you as a 19yr old. You can admire them, befriend them, etc. without significantly changing your life to incorporate them (i.e. the time and attention relationships require). You may want to question why they are choosing you and not one of their peers. So many of us have had this experience. An older gay comes along and calls you special. It’s not new. I probably shouldn’t retweet whatever random account this is, but I hope we can stop grand standing and virtue signaling around this experience and get serious.