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Ottawa, Ontario
Joined May 2021
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Hayden: why is Ilya crying?
Shane: he's drunk.
Hayden: so?
Shane: he heard me say I'm engaged.
Hayden: ... to him. You're engaged to him, right?
Shane: yep.
Hayden: so why is he crying?
Shane, sighing: he forgot we are engaged.
Ilya: okay, promise you won't freak out.
Shane: ... I promise.
*2 minutes later*
Ilya, sitting down comfortably, watching as Shane paces in front of him and pulls at his hair: by the way, great job on the not freaking out.
Ilya, unbelievably softly: Good morning, dorogoy.
Shane, smirking: Morning baby. I've got to say after last night, I'm feeling a little weak in the knees.
Troy, closing the fridge door loudly, deadpan: Here's an idea. When you walk into a room... TAKE A QUICK SCAN.
Kent: Don’t go picking a fight with me. I could make your life very difficult.
Troy: [sarcastically] Wow. I wonder what it’d be like to have a difficult life.
Harris: People perceive you as somewhat…
Ilya: tempestuous?
Harris: Heinous bitch is the term used most often.
Luca: *sends a voice note to ilya*
Ilya, texting back: I’m a little busy, is it urgent?
Luca: Nope don’t worry, just listen later.
*later*
Ilya: *presses play*
Luca's voice message: THERE IS A FUCKING FIRE-
Therapist: you seem to have a habit of attracting broken people and trying to fix them
Harris: well so do you
Therapist: but at least I'm getting paid
Harris:
Harris: touche.
*Ilya taking off his shirt while working*
Shane: I wanna lick his torso like a xylophone and see if he moans different notes.
Rose: I was gonna shove you back into the closet myself, but that was very creative, so I'll let it pass.
Ilya: You ever see something that changes your life and you're just like "huh..."
Shane, fondly: I saw you.
Ilya: ...honestly that is so cute and sweet but it kinda makes this awkward because I was gonna show you a picture of Barrett in a he-man costume. And yes there's a wig.
Ilya: "ladies and gentlemen" is unnecessarily gendered, overly formal, lengthy and honestly i'm already falling asleep.
Ilya: "cowards", on the other hand, is inclusive, to the point, and dramatic.
Harris, standing with his back turned: I’ve been expecting you, rozanov.
Ilya, flabbergasted: How did you do that without turning around?!
Harris: ... To be perfectly honest, the first couple of people I did that to were not you.
Ilya: shane, baby, my soul [teary eyed]... After everything we've been through... You can't do this, solnyshko. Please don't do this.
Shane: I'm sorry, Rozanov. I have to.
Ilya: You can't, Shane. Please! Please!
Shane, placing down a card: Uno.
Ilya: *having a breakdown*
Bood: do you need a hug?
Ilya, angrily, through tears: No!
Bood, just slightly intimidated: you sure?
Ilya, still angry; No!
Luca: I guess it is true what they say.
Ilya:
Luca: Sometimes the ones we love most, hurt us the most.
Ilya, sighing: Listen, kid, I’m sorry I ate the last doughnut.
Harris: You know those things will kill you, right?
Troy, pouring another glass of whiskey: That’s the point.
Ilya, smoking a cigarette: We’re trying to speed up the process.
Dykstra: *Nods while eating raw cookie dough*