Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr) header
Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr) profile picture

Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel

@kellynkerr

‘94. Weirdo. Witch △⃒⃘ △⃒⃘ △⃒⃘

 Las Vegas, NV
Joined April 2009
  • Tweets4.6K
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Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)Photo by Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)
Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel retweeted
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Wizard Gang
@wizardgangApr 8
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Was brushing my hair on FaceTime with my brother and he said it sounded like a textile manufacturing facility making denim fabric. It was such a deeply specific and well crafted burn that I didn’t even know how to respond
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The Frog Mage
@the_frog_mageFeb 18
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Was playing Fortnite a little drunk and thought this girl sounded cute. After learning she was 6ft tall and Puerto Rican I blurted out “are you gay?!” and my group went completely silent. So my first time flirting with a woman went well
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She was though
Image from Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)
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Mom talking about her Amazon package arriving without the Ring motion detector going off: (heavy southern accent) “Now how did that get delivered and the dingdong didn’t ding-a-ling?”
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Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel retweeted
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Shannon Watts
@shannonrwattsJan 9
The right wants us to believe that a teen who showed up at a Wisconsin rally with an AR-15 and shot three people is a peacekeeper who deserves to be celebrated, but an unarmed mom driving away from a Minnesota rally was a domestic terrorist who deserved to die.
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Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel retweeted
b (@wwxwashere) profile picture
b
@wwxwashere27 Dec 2025
if you’ve made it all of 2025 without it come claim your ⭐️
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Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel retweeted
altheboss (@AlTheBoss03) profile picture
altheboss
@AlTheBoss0316 Dec 2025
Leaving the DMV with no ID because I forgot to bring my umbilical cord & the Declaration of Independence.
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I ordered something from Shutterfly last week and have not known peace since. I’ve gotten at least one promotional email every single day. I unsubscribed and selected “too many emails” as the reason. Guess who popped up in my inbox today 💀
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Mom leaned over to my Dad and called him a “stinky shitass” Me: Does he stink? Mom: No Me: So why’d you call him that? Mom: Because I love him 🥰
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He may get on my nerves, but I love having a big brother.
Image from Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel (@kellynkerr)
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Welp. Let my driver’s license and my insurance renewal dates both fly right by so I’m now unable to drive or get my medication. I am crushing 31 so far 👍🏻
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I hate being so easily startled by noises. My cat suddenly shook herself which jingled her collar and my heart rate would’ve made you think I just witnessed a murder
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Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel retweeted
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caninepoetry@caninepoetry_24 Jun 2025
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I told my dad the new McDonald’s sauce is fire and he was like “well I don’t know if I want fire…” and I clarified that fire meant good and he said “so it’s not hot 🤨” God I love him
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I miss my friends 😞 especially my wife
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This is no exaggeration what my mom looks like on her computer
emma 🐇 (@forestdruiddyke) profile pictureemma 🐇@forestdruiddyke12 Apr 2025
Image from emma 🐇 (@forestdruiddyke)
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Ⱪellyn ☽ ℂassel retweeted
Futerko (@futerko_profi) profile picture
Futerko@futerko_profi13 Apr 2025
🎉 Doing a little giveaway to celebrate my B-day 😊 4 different ESO codes 💌 to win! To enter: 1️⃣ Follow me 2️⃣ Like this tweet 3️⃣ Retweet 4️⃣ Comment your platform + the code you'd like Winners will be picked next Sunday! Good luck! ✨ #ESO #ElderScrollsOnline #TESO #ESOFam
Image from Futerko (@futerko_profi)
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Anyone else find it weird how much the Charmin bears love talking about wiping their asses
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