𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐞𝐬 ♡ 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐝

I think people are so determined to make this observation more palatable that they’re missing the actual point. Yes, trauma responses are negatively interpreted. And what happens when people negatively interpret you? They dislike you. They label you toxic, bitter, annoying, obsessive, unstable and difficult to be around. That’s precisely what I’m describing. People are often more comfortable siding with an abuser because the abuser isn’t asking anything of them. The victim, however, is asking them to exercise empathy, discernment, integrity and sometimes accountability. One person’s distress disrupts their comfort; the other’s composure preserves it. I’ve experienced this firsthand. When I started speaking about my abuse, I wasn’t met with compassion. I was called annoying, obsessed, bitter, scorned and low vibrational. I lost support because I was no longer the happy-go-lucky person people enjoyed being around. My suffering became an inconvenience to people who had no interest in understanding it. That’s the point. Victims don’t just experience the abuse. They can also experience social rejection for exhibiting the psychological consequences of that abuse. And instead of acknowledging that reality, people keep trying to repackage it into language that makes it sound less uncomfortable. I’m not talking about people who recognize their limitations. I’m talking about people who actively dislike, discredit and socially punish victims for being visibly traumatized.