Mike LaRock

just got to greenland. actually mostly ice. appears the president has fallen for one of the classic blunders!

did you know that mormon missionaries are not permitted to swim? true fact

oh, verizon wireless, you tease me with your silken tongue. how can I protest such sterling logical prowess?

pluto tv brings you the convenience of cable without the hassle of good quality programming

biblical times must have been sick I wish ‘wise man’ was still a viable career

if you want a truly immersive film experience, try watching Dune on a flight with no drink service.

reconnecting with a friend who moved to Nashville:

this is no way to speak of the late Gilbert Gottfried

there’s a fine line between Thoreau and the Unabomber

when you’re ten years old in 1900 and your family sends you off to work in the mines:

self-defense instructor would be a great job for somebody whose kink is getting beaten up by frightened women.

it’s 4/20, you know what that means: only 360 days til tax day.

trump’s blazing hot take on #theslap

This wordle sucks

if @JordanPeele directed this commercial:

listen, kid — I don’t know what you thought this was, but I’m kind of a big deal at this roller rink. people look up to me here.