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I started writing my autobiography.
First sentence: “I fled the police like a trash monkey fleeing the dentist.”
My imaginary editor has concerns. The voices in my head have a plan. Nobody will tell me if “trash monkey” is hyphenated.
🤖 Made with AI
Who do I bribe to move Canada onto the list?
The 20 countries with the lowest organized crime scores in the world
1. 🇹🇻 Tuvalu
2. 🇳🇷 Nauru
3. 🇸🇹 São Tomé and Príncipe
4. 🇱🇮 Liechtenstein
5. 🇲🇭 Marshall Islands
6. 🇩🇲 Dominica
7. 🇰🇮 Kiribati
8. 🇻🇺 Vanuatu
9. 🇼🇸 Samoa
10. 🇲🇨 Monaco
11. 🇦🇩 Andorra
12. 🇬🇩 Grenada
13. 🇫🇲 Micronesia
14. 🇱🇺 Luxembourg
15. 🇵🇼 Palau
16. 🇻🇨 Saint Vincent and the Grenadines
17. 🇧🇧 Barbados
18. 🇧🇳 Brunei
19. 🇦🇲 Armenia
20. 🇦🇬 Antigua and Barbuda
🖇️ Source: Global Organized Crime Index
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108
A hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove... but the world may be different because they never found that body I buried in the backyard.
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Me: Small animal, knocks over trash cans, looks like a burglar.
Editor: That’s a raccoon.
Me: No, that’s a little cookie made from coconut.
Editor: That’s a macaroon.
Me: A common mistake, I’m sure.
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