Seth Simons · Jul 30, 2026 · 5:21 PM UTC

Seth Simons

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Seth Simons@sasimonsJul 30

here's how much John Mulaney's show at Ball State University made back in March. find more comedy contracts and payment records like this at comedyfees.com

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one dozen bats at a keyboard · Oct 26, 2026 · 12:10 AM UTC

Seth Simons retweeted

one dozen bats at a keyboard@PanasonicDX450013h

Brazil’s results tonight are a big endorsement for the idea that every country should have a second “are you you sure about that” election a couple weeks after the first one for the important stuff

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Marshall Steinbaum 🔥 · Oct 25, 2026 · 8:36 PM UTC

Seth Simons retweeted

Marshall Steinbaum 🔥@Econ_Marshall16h

The answer is that a functioning democracy cannot permit the far right to exist while continuing to exist itself.

Tom Phillips

@tomphillipsin16h

Reports on Brazilian TV of terrible chaos. Polling stations that had already closed their doors, reopening. Poll clerks completely confused. What a nightmare. Hard to say what the consequences might be, tonight and in the weeks and months ahead.

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Seth Simons · Oct 25, 2026 · 11:15 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimons14h

wrote a bit about this in the newsletter today, among other things humorism.xyz/comedy-news-rou…

Comedy News Roundup: October 25, 2026

Ft. Reggie Watts, Joe DeRosa, Gianmarco Soresi, Maria Bamford, Sammy Obeid, and Yannis Pappas.

humorism.xyz

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 18

the argument made here—that SNL is obviously bad and misogynistic, so people shouldn't be upset by one more misogynistic joke—conveniently forgets that the "whores" joke came during a nationwide conversation about rape culture. also it's a dumb argument for other reasons

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Seth Simons · Oct 25, 2026 · 10:15 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimons15h

jeff ross, the roastmaster?

martin short 4ever@martinhayter_16h

marty with eugene, bill murray, and jeff ross at the wedding ❤️

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dave horwitz🪣 · Oct 25, 2026 · 7:31 PM UTC

Seth Simons retweeted

dave horwitz🪣@Dave_Horwitz17h

Having gone to LA estate sales I know that many of them are organized by 3rd party companies who are very professional and thorough so this seems deliberate. If there is a worse hell below hell…

ashley ray@theashleyrayOct 25

he sold her fucking things

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Seth Simons · Oct 25, 2026 · 5:27 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimons19h

🐐 newyorker.com/culture/the-ne…

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Seth Simons · Oct 25, 2026 · 12:20 AM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 25

Megan Koester on the estate sale: exclusivecontent.substack.co…

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 23

Reggie Watts is having an estate sale tomorrow. the catalogue includes his bondage kit estatesales.net/CA/Los-Angel…

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Seth Simons · Oct 24, 2026 · 11:55 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 24

Melina 🍏@flowersmacca70sOct 24

A beautiful John Lennon photographed by Paul McCartney

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Krapp's Last Vape · Oct 24, 2026 · 4:57 PM UTC

Seth Simons retweeted

Krapp's Last Vape@SatireRedactedOct 24

In retrospect, and despite the many hours logged online, it is clear that irony detection only works when your ideological priors are affirmed. So here is the “esoteric” message for those reactionary mystics dabbling in lit: Better art results when you do not desire domination.

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mentally chill · Oct 24, 2026 · 8:38 PM UTC

Seth Simons retweeted

mentally chill@eleum_fuckOct 24

Straight up it is astounding how effective “hey don’t say that shit no more” is. You’re not gonna change minds but you will get people to stop saying slurs. Works particularly in public.

Carl Barks@theCarlBarks8 Sep 2025

so grateful for Stavvy immediately pushing back against this dogshit

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Futurama Quotes · Oct 24, 2026 · 7:02 PM UTC

Seth Simons retweeted

Futurama Quotes@QuotesFuturamaOct 24

With my last breath, I curse Zoidberg! #Futurama

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Seth Simons · Oct 24, 2026 · 10:41 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 24

Homer 💞

The Simpsons Man

@TheSimpsonsMan_Oct 24

Please

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Seth Simons · Oct 24, 2026 · 8:34 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 24

that’s right. liberals famously love and celebrate protests that damage property

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Seth Simons · Oct 24, 2026 · 8:27 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 24

i love to be a publicist and do publicity for my client, who has been charged with rape

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Seth Simons · Oct 24, 2026 · 7:16 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 24

hopefully this never happens to me

Uche

@uchay_FOct 21

Anything for Jackson (2020) one of modern horror’s most effective slow burn tension scenes.

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Seth Simons · Oct 24, 2026 · 5:42 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 24

i love the novavax vaccine… i wish i could get it all the time. but, they make you wait at least eight weeks between doses

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Seth Simons · Oct 24, 2026 · 4:48 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 24

i appreciate the Dave and Buster’s app notifying me whenever I’m near a Dave and Buster’s, but it’s just not necessary. I already know

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Seth Simons · Oct 24, 2026 · 4:38 PM UTC

Seth Simons@sasimonsOct 24

I can’t believe the guy who agreed to be Bud Light’s olive branch to transphobes, and his friend Danny McBride, would do this

Variety

@VarietyOct 23

Shane Gillis and Danny McBride play feuding weathermen in a new four-minute Kalshi ad. “In the past year I’ve made some questionable trades on contracts for local weather, Costco hot dog prices and cricket,” McBride said in a statement. “Working with Kalshi to make this very unique ad was a great way to both make amends on some of my questionable predictions, but also get to work with Shane, and reunite with my good pal, Deep Roy.” variety.com/2026/tv/news/sha…

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