Sam Everard

Haven’t been able to stop thinking about this pizza flyer ever since it came through the door. Just an unbelievably specific and funny thing to include. There has to have been an incident that led to this but I think it’s better that we’ll never know

Is there another set of Coen Brothers that I’m not aware of? Because otherwise…no?

Imodium really got in there with the best medicine name possible. Feels like it describes exactly what it’s going to do, in a way that’s not entirely tangible

This hosepipe ban is a nightmare, what do you mean I can’t take my dick out until it rains enough again?

Heartwarming. Streamers should be beaten with umbrellas wherever they go 😇🙏

Labour will lose so, so many seats tomorrow and they’ll deserve it completely. Nobody on the left agrees with any of this. They’re tilting just as far right as all the racists and fascists in blue and purple on the ballot

I Know Why the Caged Butt Sings

Hamnet Snack Tie-In

Cleaning Tip: pick up every item around your house once per day and it’ll never accumulate dust!

Everyone sucks here! Kuenssberg’s a joke as any Brit knows but Harris has incredibly thin skin and immediately condescends/sneers at the idea that she might be REMOTELY culpable for fucking up a layup election and contributing to the planet’s decline in the process

Just got around to listening to Jamie Lee Curtis’ WTF interview, and what a complete fucking narcissist loser she is. Crying crocodile tears over Charlie fucking Kirk because he was a ‘devout man of faith’. Peak spineless liberalism

Mr Muscle 🤝 A Perfectionist Dutch Cobbler

Not horrified enough to actually do shit about it, are you? You’re an accomplice. There’s so much blood on your hands.

This is literally just the same joke as the original post. Why am I still on this braindead rage-inducing app. Life doesn’t have to be like this

When you accidentally birth twin Mick Hucknalls

*Spanish Movie Set* “Where’s the production designer?” “Yeah, Where’s the production designer”

Taking them out forever by hitting them with a ‘passing the phone to an insufferable out of touch cunt with negative levels of self-awareness’ and they get caught in an endless feedback loop

Dickheads When It’s Sunny and Over 10 Degrees Outside #TikTok vm.tiktok.com/ZNd2TfBkB/

It’s ELAINE STRETCH! The Broadway Grand Dame who’s also the ELASTIC SMASH HIT toy! Posable DIVA! Comes with 15 CATCHPHRASES! 🎵Here’s to the ladies who PUNCH!🎵

A man next to me on my flight yesterday watched at least 8 back to back episodes of Brooklyn 99 and he didn’t laugh once. Nary a chuckle. Not even a light smirk. Just stone-faced watching hours of a TV show that he’d downloaded in advance and presumably enjoyed.

Maybe blowing this out of proportion but it’s so sad and scary that there’s just this accepted facet of modern living where reaching out for connection in a completely normal way can result in someone you trust throwing you to the online wolves with a ‘look at this fucking loser’