oh god what is this I AM NOT OKAY
Seattle
Joined December 2009
- Tweets123
- Following11
- Followers4
- Likes31
lusty mayonnaise retweeted
Race cars, laser, aeroplanes. It's a duck blur. Might solve a mystery. Or fuck a cat. #ducktales #oohwooew
lusty mayonnaise retweeted
I like all kinds of people, except people who like all kinds of music except country and rap.
lusty mayonnaise retweeted
Tweet dripping w/ over-the-top sycophancy: $0
Waiting 1/2 day for response: $0
Luring world's most monumental buffoon into RT'ing: PRICELESS
lusty mayonnaise retweeted
"@BeccaPiano: @realDonaldTrump You look so FORCEFUL on you're book cover! That's what we, America's women, admire about you.
Shaking with barely-supressed pollen-lust, the bee writhes wildly across your dashboard. Covered in thick, exotic dusts, and humming feveri
#WeCantBeInARelationshipIf you made a music video intercut with awful a-list movie footage #mariah
@bktallguy slow down there pardner, that last tweet didn't have a single "cunt," "fuck," or "cuntfuck" in it
I liked a @YouTube video youtu.be/Q1BcMUKUuFA?a Smurf Party all nude co-ed revue feat. Ben Affleck and paul from wonder y3ars
welp, you heard it here first, my jokes are awful. thanks professional comedian @bktallguy, i was nervous the misogyny was real