how to bring back house parties: > BE the change you wish to see people!! > a good party has a balance of old friends + new faces > make a list of everyone you'd love to know better - from neighbors to that person you always say "let's hang" to! that's your invite list > give people a plus-one option - it takes pressure off you AND them > send a personalized message about why you'd love to see each person there - it will help increase RSVP rates!! > you don't need a million friends, a perfect place, or an overly complicated plan > keep it simple - snacks, drinks, music typically does the job. MAYBE an activity or a theme too > people matter more than anything. your #1 job: introduce people to each other & don't leave anyone standing alone! > YOU can be the reason your friends get to know each other more deeply, your community feels closer, and everyone had a great night house parties are how we build community AND bring back serendipity let's bring it back!!! you got this!!!!

my friend asked if i have any tips for when great friendships start drifting apart (of course I do!!!) this is a hard part of adulting and most people struggle with it silently tips: > you're not a bad person for outgrowing a friend > there's this idea that you make a "set" of friends and keep them forever - but the reality is people change every few years. different life stages, different priorities, different cities. it's all normal > you can think of friendships as having different frequencies - daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, yearly. people drift between these naturally > the friends who are meant to stick around WILL. the ones who require imbalanced effort to maintain may not be your people anymore there's two buckets: 1/ friends you *want* to reconnect with 2/ friends you naturally drifted from let's break it down!! 1/ friends you want to reconnect with: > the drift isn't always personal - people get busy, deal with health stuff, move cities, go through life changes > many of these friendships can bounce back > if you want to reconnect, reach out! say you miss them, ask if they want to reconnect, make a plan > if needed, don't be afraid of the hard conversation - "hey, I feel like we've drifted - did something change or are we just in different seasons right now?" (i did this with a few friends and it was really really really healing & made our relationships stronger) 2/ friends you naturally drifted from > it absolutely hurts to lose closeness with someone who used to be your go-to person. let yourself feel sad about it! > a hard reality: you'll never be exactly the two of you as you were when you first became friends. people grow and change - both of you. sometimes you grow together and sometimes you grow apart > a person can be your friend for just a season but that doesn't make the friendship any less meaningful > if you're the only one initiating, if conversations feel like work, if you don't vibe anymore, if you have different values systems - it's okay to let it drift > not every friendship needs a big breakup conversation. but if you feel you need closure, don't shy away from having the hard conversation first > you are allowed (and it is healthy!!) to grieve a friendship that's changed acknowledging that your friendships have evolved means making space for NEW friends who fit your current life you deserve friendships that feel easy and reciprocal and light!! you're allowed to grow!! you got this!!!

my friend asked if i had thoughts on WHY making friends is so hard (of course I do!!!) sometimes the issue isn't tactical - it's deeper what's actually happening: > if you think people don't like you.. you feel awkward going to events, uncomfortable following up, and hesitant to be yourself > you've now created a self-fulfilling prophecy. you hold back, don't follow up, and assume everyone is just being polite. you've put up a wall and your hesitation reads as disinterest > of COURSE you're not seeing the results you want! > here's the thing: people ARE interested. but you aren't giving them a chance to get to know you (!!!) > open up your body language. smile, make eye contact, position yourself near the action. people can't approach you if you look unapproachable > have the audacity to believe that people ARE curious about you. they WANT to hear from you!! > share your genuine excitement, hobbies, energy. share about a vacation you went on, where you're from, or even a tidbit about what you did that day. fill the convo with authenticity. > not everyone will be your person and that's okay!!! you don't need to make a friend in everyone, just need to find YOUR people > it's going to take small steps to change your mindset, but it's like a muscle you can grow if you start to nourish it > let's start putting in the reps!!! stay longer than you normally would, talk to one extra person, smile a little more, follow up even when it's scary, breathe through it. you can do this. you are WONDERFUL! > you'll start to see that it's not as scary as it might seem. that there's a world out there for you filled with wonderful conversations, laughter, kind hearts. a whole table filled with people who love you!!! at the root of all this is a deeper feeling that you aren't likeable, and i promise you that you are! people WANT to get to know you. they want to know your inner quirkiness and wonderfulness. you need to start believing you're someone worth talking to - invest in yourself and pour into your cup you ARE someone worth getting to know!!! but they can't find you if you're hiding!!! go get em!!!

I had serious acid reflux and got prescribed something for it a few years ago before starting it, my sister said “I think this is about something else.. what are you avoiding?” had a mental breakdown right there, figured out what was wrong, and the acid reflux went away

whenever my boyfriend and I argue, we like to reminder ourselves that - both of us don’t want to be arguing - both of us are generally good logical people with a perspective that probably makes sense so let’s breathe, reset, and try again knowing we both have good intentions

spent a few months getting really really clear on what I want in a relationship showed the list to my bf about a week into meeting him for fun he’s like “did you write this about me?” because it perfectly described him, down to a niche phrase he often says I’d written it 6 months before

wonder in what way my partner isn’t fulfilling me now that pushed me to get so close to someone else, and see if my partner can work to fill those needs - I chose them for a reason a great relationship is nourished & fed & tended to

why change? because there’s a better life waiting for you on the other side !!! man has millions, beautiful children and wife, but can’t stop working to enjoy the fruits of his labor because he feels he needs to be *more* powerful man has huge audience that no longer feels aligned but keeps going for years, unsatisfied, because he’s scared those people wouldn’t follow him to the next thing man sells company, reaches peak, but realizes the thing that once fulfilled him is no longer his, feeling empty, because he doesn’t really know what is left of him underneath all the hustle and hype there’s a life waiting for you on the other side where you find what *actually* lights you up. where you use all the skills and talents and energy and ambition you naturally have and channel it into what genuinely motivates you there’s a life waiting for you on the other side where you can be *happy* for what you already have. you feel comfortable pausing to enjoy the fruits of your labor and invest into other areas that feel important to you, especially your health and relationships. a life waiting for you on the other side that doesn’t feel so heavy. so frustrating. so tough. so empty. instead, you feel lighter, happier, more joyful. a life where your ambition doesn’t control you anymore - *you* control it.

exhibit A omg I’ve been thinking about how to grow what I do beyond just SF but feeling a bit stuck THEN I get this email from someone who works at a coffee shop in Virginia who saw one of my videos on my new idea and now wants to make it happen there!!!

my favorite ways to talk to a stranger: - offer to take a photo for them in pretty places - ask what food they ordered - comment on how beautiful the weather is - give them a casual compliment - ask what they're reading - ask for directions - casual smile when you walk by either it leads to a longer convo or it's just a positive human interaction of the day - both are perfect!

it did take a lot of effort to create room for a good romantic relationship to come into my life if you keep ending up in the same position over and over, there’s probably a lesson to be learned there there’s some pattern YOU keep engaging in that isn’t serving you anymore I did a lot of inner work to unpack my relationship with dating - honestly a lot of stemmed back to my childhood, parents divorce, etc - and did many months of healing around that I also spent a lot of time defining what it is I actually wanted for myself what would it look like? what would it feel like? when I re-entered the dating pool, I felt like a totally different person I was much quicker to say no to anyone who didn’t feel like a fit I believe I found my person because I wasn’t entertaining time with the people who were clearly “no’s” anyway, definitely spend time trying to heal 10/10 🤍

mission: bring connection back to our coffee shops first event complete!!!! ✨ 11 strangers in the neighborhood who might otherwise never have met came together for an hour of cozy chats (& we got free samples 🥹) – at Belmont, CA