jeremy

1. My father is dead. 2. I have thought long and hard about how to say this. I have just had to settle on the truth. 3. On Saturday 10th October, I was with him at the funeral of his sister. We did not speak. He was sitting with the elders. I raised my hand to him. And he nodded and flashed his 32. 4. I looked awa embarrassed. Shy that everyone knew my dad was my number 1 fan and cheerleader; and had no poker face when he say me. He beamed without control. 5. I rolled my eye in my head. 6. That was the last time “we spoke.” Sorry we did not speak. Not in the conventional sense. That is how we spoke. A raised hand met a nod. 7. At my auntie’s funeral. I was only thinking of a work I was doing for the Constitution Review Implementation Committee that I needed to send that Saturday. So I sat half the funeral in my car and worked. 8. I took time to stand and look at the body of my Auntie. I said a prayer. Removed myself when I was getting emotionally overwhelmed and drove back to Accra. 9. That evening I wrote a long post about death. Her death. The next morning, I wrote … ““Slow down. You are doing fine. You can’t be everything… before your time. “ Breathe today. You are alive. That’s a good starting place. You will survive. ❤️” 10. Two hours later, my dad sent me his last message “ Mercy woke me up again”. 11. An hour later, i was at my desk working. When I got a call that a Good Samaritan had found him on the street; and they were transporting him to a hospital. 12. Apparently my father, was taking a walk towards the funeral house where his sister’s funeral was being held. 13. The Samaritan had dialled his last dialled numbers. 14. I called family who were closer to get to him. 15. While on those calls, coordinating to get help for my dad. 16. I got the text “Call me again. What am hearing is not a good news. I learnt he's no more”. I shut down. 17. He arrived at the hospital dead. I found out the next day when I went to the hospital to arrange transfer of “his body”. 18. According to the Samaritan, he was in a Trotro when he say a man collapsed on the side of the road; and some kids trying to steal his phones. He got out, gave them a chase and retrieved the phones. 19. Having no car and no access to any ambulance, he called a “pragya”. 20. He died before they got to the hospital 21. My uncle messaged me some days later. “Your father died a gentleman. He said. I said no. Don’t sugarcoat it. My father died by the side of a road. 22. I did not expect to be this hard hit by the death of my father. Not that I know what to expect on the death of a father. 23. My father loved me. More than I ever could love myself. 24. At night, when I am unable to sleep; which is everyday now. I read messages from his phone. 25. My fathers whole life revolved around forwarding my Facebook posts to friends. Sending news stories about me to friends. 26. He talked to friends about the day I will become president. 27. When people had any problem, he told them his son the lawyer can help. Just give him a call. 28. He had no life outside of me I could find enough details of. 29. I didn’t see that from my end. From my end, I saw a father I could never tell a secret to. Because he couldn’t keep his mouth about me. 30. If I told him, I was in Europe speaking at a conference. He made sure the whole world knew. Details I kept off Facebook; he will tell others even when I made him swear not to. 31. He knew only how to love one way. Proudly. 32. I hated my father for it. It is those we love that we hate the most. 33. My son will never meet my father. And that brings tears to my eyes. ******** God on high, hear my prayer In my need, You have always been there He is young, he's afraid Let him rest. Bring him home … The summers die, one by one How soon they fly, on and on And I am old and will be gone Bring him peace, bring him joy He is young, he is only a boy You can take, you can give Let him be, let him live