I’m convinced New York is a social experiment. New bread store just opened (not a bakery, but a bread store): Rye I went in to grab a loaf, my friend and I took guesses on how much a loaf would cost I guessed $25 She guessed $80 based on the interior of the store $60 for a loaf of bread. There’s no way people with a fully developed frontal cortex are buying $60 loafs of bread

imagine posting on X and expecting to not be bullied

When I was six years old, I complained at Disney World because I thought it was for “kids” My best friend just informed me she no longer wants to be my friend. She says we can’t be friends because I don’t want to go on a Disney cruise with her. To be honest, I don’t even know how I’m friends with someone who likes Disney, nevermind Disney cruises. Disney adults are my biggest fear Fat people are my second biggest fear And cruise ships my third Why would I pay money to be stuck on a cruise ship with fat people who like Disney world? Sounds like hell!

Friday night when no man is disturbing your peace

Wearing my ex boyfriend’s sweater. Hot men keep yelling “hook em” at me Literally no clue what they’re talking about. Look down and realize I’m wearing a Texas sweater? Maybe that’s something they say in Texas? Never been to Texas but do know the men who like that team have all been hot. If you want hot men to approach you just wear football things, easy convo started 10/10 experiment

When you date someone who is not over their ex, what was meant to be a relationship between 2 people becomes a relationship between 3. This person is inadvertently thrown into your life. It’s the same pattern every time. They claim to be completely over it. They claim to hate them. But the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference. Having the energy to hate them means you still really love them. And one of the nastiest things you can do to someone is drag them into your unfinished business. People deserve to be treated like people. Don’t enter a new relationship if you’re not over the last. Take time to be alone, because if you rush into something new, I can tell you with absolute certainty that it will not last.

If you don’t speak English, you deserve to be deported. If you couldn’t pass a citizenship test, you deserve to be deported. If you intend to rely on the government to support yourself, you deserve to be deported. Adios abuela!

Big government socialism is now mainstream #ad

My friend has booked a romantic getaway in the woods. The catch? She couldn't pick between her boyfriend or her girlfriend so she invited us both. She informed me I could bring someone "if I could find him" (rude) Who wants to be my fake boyfriend to save me from third wheeling?

Hi i’m Raquel and I am addicted to buying overpriced candles

White women will hard launch 4 boyfriends in one year and call every single one of them the love of her life

Men will say they hate Botox and like a “natural woman” straight to the face of a woman they don’t realize has botox

Is there going to always be someone better? Yes. But the point is picking someone and committing to them.

Affluent White Female Lib starter pack: 1. Very well educated (liberal arts degree + unpaid internships) 2. Does what she loves because “money doesn’t matter” (Dad’s Amex or her husband’s salary does) 3. Men are trash (but they fund rent & pilates) 4. Strong opinions on housing policy while living in the place her parents bought or her husband pays for 5. Protests capitalism but has a very specific order at the $18 oat milk latte place 6. Therapy for her "childhood trauma" (private school & her parents divorce) 7. “I’m not like other girls” (much more annoying) 8. Hates Shane Gillis

I can tell how much someone works out by the number of photos they post at the gym How do I know this? Because I just look in the mirror and take pics of myself at the gym and I got a LONG way to go

The Muslim equivalent of garlic for vampires?

Bag: $14,000 Bracelets: $30,000 Sunnies: $900 Go socialism yay! Turn Texas blue 💙 EAT THE RICH 💙🇺🇸💙 *paid for by her husband

Liberals are homophobic

$300 service charge/night? For a hotel? Tipping culture is out of hand.