Imagine it’s coming up to the end of the year, and your employer runs an annual fun day for employees and their families. It’s something that gets talked about throughout the year, and it’s a chance to see people out of their work clothes and to meet their kids. It’s a community building event. Your employer announces that there’s a change of policy this year. It’s going to become the annual Rewards fun day. In order to attend, you have to ace your appraisal, get good 360 feedback ratings from all your colleagues and not have taken too many sick days. They send round a motivational email, telling you all to do your best and reminding you how much fun the day is going to be. They tell you that this is to help you all achieve your best and remind you that it’s not just you, it’s your whole family who stand to lose or gain by this. If you don’t make the grade, you’ll need to come to work as usual and put in a full working day whilst your colleagues enjoy themselves elsewhere. You’ve had a hard year and you don’t always see eye to eye with your manager. Your appraisal doesn’t go well. You are told you can’t come. How do you feel about your employers now? Would being excluded motivate you to do better next year? Would it improve the relationship between you and your manager? Would it help you learn how to be a better employee? And if not, why would we think that it would be any different for our children?