r/dating_advice survivor
Joined December 2024
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bcool retweeted
There is no chad. Chad is an internet abstraction.
There are men who act and men who don't.
bcool retweeted
The more women you sleep with, the higher your standards rise.
This does make it harder to fall in love.
But not impossible.
Abundance just makes you more selective.
If you had 100 friends, you wouldn't just become friends with just anybody.
Because you're not desperate.
bcool retweeted
"Then proceeds to tame him"
A man who can be tamed is not a beast. Or, a leader who can be made into a follower is not a, natural, leader.
So whatever she saw in him originally is proven to be false.
Or.
She will try to secure the man. And will try to be sure that the man is, it.
Her only tools are manipulation, drama, and control.
She will at times try to control you while trying to measure her own security, but presented as a win/lose.
"If you want to have me, you have to lose who you are".
Here's how you pass both tests in one:
I do whatever the fuck I want.
If I choose to be with you, is because I choose to. If I choose to be with someone else, there's nothing you can do to stop me.
I do what I want.
I bend to no one.
bcool retweeted
One time I was in a department store with my mom. It was the early 1990s. All the kids at school had Jordans. I wanted Jordans, of course, but my mom wasn’t going to lay out $100 when other sneakers cost $40.
Then I spotted a pair of Jordans on the shelf for $40. I got excited. I figured I’d finally get my pair. Then I saw something that stopped me cold: they were noticeably damaged. I put the pieces together quickly. This was why they were $40.
I got them anyway.
As it turns out, at 11 years old I had less discerning taste than the girl on Love Is Blind. That man is the damaged pair of Jordans. He comes very close to being the idealized man, but at every turn something is slightly off. He talks like Connecticut royalty while somehow seeming like a dork. He tries to seem suave and pulls it off just enough to make you wonder. Then he says something incelish.
He claims he’s never been in love, and you wonder: is that because you’re some emotionally cold playboy with a new woman every few weeks, or because you’re just a fucking loser?
Then you look at him more closely, and the damaged Jordans become impossible to ignore. In a certain light, he has great hair, a large frame, and an admirable jawline. But somehow it all comes together as the weird, bizarro, dollar-store version of a handsome man. An uncanny valley where every feature is almost right, making the whole thing feel even more wrong.
A pair of damaged sneakers that no one wanted.
But me, of course. I got my pair of Jordans. I was happy.
Scott Stewart is the Director of Engineering at SharkNinja, where he has multiple patents attributed to him.
Jacqueline “Jax” Guelli is a 31 year old aesthetician who admits she was a "sugar baby" in her 20s.
It's also been reported she was a mid-tier escort in Boston as well.
They are look-matched and yet she was physically repulsed by Stew to the point she ran off the show and ghosted him.
And now Stew is entertaining giving her another chance.
Modern dating is cooked.
bcool retweeted
This Man's true problem
Is that he has Aura
But he does not know that he has Aura
And therefore, he is allowing others, especially this woman, to dictate what he deserves
Aura is meant to be ABUSED
If you do not, others will take it and abuse YOUUUU
@aruvinchan
bcool retweeted
The reason the Manosphere is so important is because it's the "banned book" of the 21st century.
Nobody taught us that we have to be careful of female nature, hypergamy, dual mating strategy, provider hunters, manipulation, gaslighting, marriage, cohabitation, dead bedrooms, divorce, family court, cops, child alienation, false accusations, etc. etc.
Conversely, society, religion, culture, media, schools, parents, and women THEMSELVES only teach us that women are these delicate, innocent creatures capable of doing no wrong.
We're indoctrinated from a young age that it's our sacred duty to protect women, sacrifice ourselves for women, and foot the bill for life for women.
Because that's what a real man does.
They keep lying to us about the truth about women and constantly gaslight us that we're paranoid or overthinking it whenever we raise legitimate concerns and issues.
We've seen the bodies piling up, we've heard the horror stories, and now thank God it's no longer as easy as it was in the past to pull the wool over our eyes.
We men really are alone in this world -- everyone is against us, everyone is out to USE us.
We only have ourselves to trust.
This is exactly why the Manosphere is so damn important.
It's the only space that cares for men and puts men first.
THIS STUFF CAN SAVE YOUR LIFE.
IT CERTAINLY SAVED MINE.
I would have most likely ended up as an unappreciated, unseen, unloved husband-material workhorse playing house to some useless parasite with Baby Rabies that she expects me to fund for the next 20 years if I didn't develop mental clarity and break out of the mold early in my adult life.
Remember, this isn't stuff that's shoved down your throat by everyone from all directions.
This is stuff you have to proactively seek out for yourself, and, for too many of you, you found this stuff too late.
Only we men care for men.
Everyone else just wants us men to eat shit and work for the benefit of others until the day we die.
bcool retweeted
It’s inconceivable to a woman that other people aren’t the same as her. Because in her universe, they’re not really people. They’re an extension of her life.
“If men are so sad about not having casual sex, why don’t they just go have sex? That’s what I do.”
- @Archwinger1
bcool retweeted
If you are not deeply captivated and in love with your woman to the point you would never even dream of cheating on her, then your practical motivation not to cheat should be that every woman you sexually involve yourself with will feel entitled to you as if she has some sort of spiritual claim on you, and will spitefully go out of her way to create hassle for you if she ever feels wronged by you.
And she will feel wronged if she decides she wants a relationship with you even after explicitly agreeing to less than that with you - a woman who has been sexually involved with you generally feels entitled to a relationship with you, even if a relationship was never your intention and you made that explicitly known to her from the start.
Some women use sex as a foot in the door strategy to get the relationship they really want with a man, whilst men will often be willing to have sex with women they would never wish to be stuck in a relationship with. You are at cross purposes.
Man is not naturally a monogamous animal, so he would do well to remember this: when you cheat, you are giving a woman you don't even respect enough to commit to the capacity to blackmail you. This should be your greatest disincentive not to cheat. If guilt and morality alone are not enough to chain your worst predilections, preventing women you do not care for from causing you problems should be.
bcool retweeted
One thing you learn about incels is that they are some of the toughest people to help in any meaningful way.
The reason is they actually have the biggest ego and are by far the most entitled kind of guys you will meet.
In reality, that's all they have left. Life has done them so dirty be it through their upbringing or circumstances that all they have left is the ability to be "right".
If you offer them any suggestion or try to help them, they will try to outargue and outdebate you every time.
It's almost tragic because they need all the help and advice they can get but taking it means hurting the only thing they have left in their lives, their ego and any last bit of pride.
Most of the time, you just have to let it get so bad that they are willing to do anything to change.
bcool retweeted
Why women cheat.
Why not just "end things" before switching to a new guy.
Because.
One. They don't know what they want until they have first experienced it.
Two. The relationship was already dead and they need to awaken themselves from it. By experiencing it.
It's a self-discovery process that gets enacted first, to be revealed, second.
She has to live the experience of being out of the relationship to then actually be out of the relaltionship.
Works the same the way up.
She needs to first be in bed and experiencing the newly born relationship to then be the person who is in that relationship.
Or.
She cheats because it was already dead. It was not a decision. It happened - to her.
Then she makes sure it actually happens to her.
bcool retweeted
Women's screening order: status, looks, behavior.
"Ah then I need to pursue status, looks max, and change all of my behavior to be a chad!"
No.
Women are not worth it.
But not like that either.
Status is not worth it.
Looks are not worth it.
Behavior is not worth it.
Nothing that requires your transformation is worth it when your starting point is that you must be worth something in order to get what you want.
The trade off stops functioning the moment you put your self on the table.
Or.
You have to let the rewards come as a side effect. Not as the objective.
Status, because you got really fucking good at something and you do enjoy all the climbing.
Looks, because you enjoy the gym and like to look, good.
Behavior, because you found out living like a pansy was not really, you.
Otherwise you attempt a transaction. You put all of your value in a bag, and try to purchase someone else's bag with it.
And that bag is always empty.
Both of you, really.
bcool retweeted
To understand why women become badly reactive when you point out something to them they don’t like… read the below process of how a lie is integrated as “truth” and funnelled back to you.
A believed lie is always more convincing than the one you don’t believe in.
So it is crucial she lies to herself first.
“Healing” is just integrated gaslight. Takes away all her rawness and last but not least honesty.
Wow yeah!
I mean yes of course women lie. I just think that, sometimes, other people, including men, are just second-position recipients of women’s lies.
Like this:
1) Something happens.
2) She feels shame/fear.
3) She reframes it in her head.
4) She believes in her own reframe.
5) She lies to you, now thinking it’s not even a lie.
So, if later, a man refutes her lies to her face, that woman feels like someone is attacking her inner world/harmony, so she has a meltdown.
bcool retweeted
Incels talk about “Chad” so much but no one can actually define him.
Is Chad your old buddy from high school who naturally got girls?
Is Chad a model?
What’s the minimum height to be Chad?
How often do you see Chad?
WHO is Chad?
Every incel has an idea in their head of who this supposed “Chad” who doesn’t need to lift a finger is, yet they all simultaneously disagree with each other lmao.
One incels Chad is another incels HTN.
The real truth they aren’t ready to hear is that Chad is a fictional character they invented in their minds to cuck themselves. He’s essentially their personal boogeyman following them everywhere they go and whispering thoughts in their head to keep them feeling inferior.
bcool retweeted
It's not the past sex. It's that most of the past sex happened for the cost of a drink with relative strangers with great enthusiasm, while today's sex must be earned and carefully doled out as a penalty for being relationship material
bcool retweeted
Women look at tasks not based on how difficult they are but by the social ramifications of failing them.
That’s why they tend to catastrophize simple chores. They’re afraid of how they’ll look if they fail.